The Road Warrior

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I’ve been invited to join a biker gang. The gang, which uses the handle of “The Wolverines,” consists of the younger ex-pat teachers here in LianYunGang. I should be clear in stating that there are no actual motorcycles in this gang; in fact the most powerful bike in the gang would be an electronic scooter. But since I bought a bicycle earlier this week, I’m now eligible to ride with the big boys. Besides, I can always use a playing card on the rear spokes to make it sound like I’m tearing up the asphalt on a motorcycle.

Speaking of hopeless attempts at being cool, I felt particularly awesome last night. Not only because I was in the company of a particularly gorgeous Chinese lady (who wants to be my friend merely because I speak English; can you believe it? I don’t have to be charming or funny, I can just open my mouth and I’m guaranteed to have the company of beautiful women); mostly I felt awesome because I gave her a lift on the bicycle in hilarious fashion. My bicycle, like most here in China, is equipped with a carrying rack that sits over the rear wheel. This is convenient for carrying things like books or packages, but also for carrying lightweight people. Back home I never had a bike with one of these rear carrier racks, so I never explored the charming possibilities of taxiing girls and other friends on the back while I pedaled.

So there I was, pedaling my bike while transporting a very attractive cargo and I was just waiting for the opening verses of “Raindrops keep fallin’ on my head,” ala Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid. But instead I settled for the very satisfying mental image of the whole scene. It was truly one of those situations where you wish a camera was handy. Oh well, but that doesn’t mean my eyes will soon be turning red. Because I’m free, nothing’s worrying me…

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